When I wrote the guitar part to this song, that vocal melody and the words 'no more' came out. That was so clearly what this song had to be. Singing is scary for me, so to put out this super vulnerable, melodramatic vocal performance brings up some resistance for sure.
After the explosion of rage and chaos that is track 1, this song sinks down into the emotions the anger was holding us above - in this case powerlessness and despair. If you understand cover emotions, you probably know that things like anger and hatred are there to hold us above something more painful. If someone tells me I'm worthless and no one likes me, it feels a lot better to punch them in the face than it does to say 'wow, that really upsets me, maybe I am worthless.' Fortress Falling is the blind rage and anger that ignites the album into action, this is the aftermath. This is what's behind all that rage. To me, the vocals are the wounded inner child just screaming out 'NO MORE, I can't take any more pain'. I didn't use any pitch correction, and specifically left some 'off' notes in the vocal take. This album is just so not meant to be polished and perfect. It's ugly and raw, the vocal performance is weak and vulnerable and I don't want to hide any of that.
The ambient second half really gets me too. It's one of the most heart wrenching listens for me out of the whole Chii catalog. To me that part represents the general feelings I associate with diving into subconscious memories when doing things like shadow work and inner child work. The subconscious is abstract and unfamiliar, which is represented for me in the overall feel of the whole ambient section. But within all of the dreamlike haze is so much pain and anguish. That entire section was entirely improvised. I finished the song I had and just kept playing my guitar through a bunch of effects and this beautiful painful thing came out. I love it.
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